How Would You Spend Billions Of Dollars? Here's Paul Allen's Answer

So you're single and have billions. What would you spend it on? Okay, I get the guitars and the planes and the yacht and the sports stuff. These are all things that I'd probably want, too. But there's an enormous fucking elephant in the room that nobody's talking about. Where's the decadent stuff? Where are the chicks? Where are the strip clubs? Where's the booze collection and the mountain of coke?

See, this is why I'm destined to never have that kind of dough. By now my nose would have fallen off and my dick probably would have, too. My "winning" would make Charlie Sheen look like an amateur. I'd have an international chain of strip clubs, probably have every STD known to man and stacks of babes piled up in every port in the world just waitin' for the super-yacht to come cruisin' into town. I'd buy Playboy and Hustler just because I could. Hot chicks would staff every position in all my companies and none of 'em would be allowed to wear clothes. It'd be my personal version of Caligula. Oh, and one other thing - a TIME MACHINE so if I ever fucked up really bad I'd just go back in time and erase it. Bang. Done. Pay attention!